Uncomfortable

A paraphrase of Francis Chan in our Bible study Forgotten God "when God asks His people to do something, it's usually not comfortable."
Whoa, that's uncomfortable. God's call to be bold and share the gospel with others. Uncomfortable. God's call to be a light in the darkness. Uncomfortable. God's call to make disciples and lay down your life and hate your father and mother. All uncomfortable.

I was reminded last night how uncomfortable adoption is. Through a series of circumstances I was reminded again that both of my children have another set of fathers and mothers who love them, miss them and think about them every day. We have given them pictures and they probably look at them. Wondering what their daughters are doing today. Wondering if they are being held, loved, given the things in life they felt they were unable to provide. These beautiful young ladies thought that Matt and I could give Hannah and Olivia the things that they couldn't.

Adoption is the most joyful, awkward, humbling, and uncomfortable experience I have ever been part of. My heart breaks for the sin that leads to the need of adoption. It makes me gather my children in my arms and not act like a savior that rode in on a horse to save them from a life they might have led, but makes me praise the Lord that His provision is for these girls to be in our house and makes me hug them a little tighter. It reminds me that there are two mothers with empty arms while mine are full. That I am experiencing every milestone, memory and hilariousness of children, while she doesn't. I almost feel sometimes that they are just over my shoulder, watching me kiss owies, change diapers and give snuggles. It sometimes alters my response to them. It gives me that extra touch of patience that I need when I remember that someone else is missing out on this. I am so grateful that the Lord wrote Hannah and Olivia's stories before they were born and they were our children.
We don't know what's to come with adoption, especially with kids of a difference race than us. My children may end up just fine. My children, at one point, may yell at me that I'm not their real mom. They may not. Either way I am glad I don't know the road ahead for us because I don't know if I could handle it. But what I do know is that the Lord gives us the grace we need each day to handle that day's trouble. No more, no less.

My challenge to you, is to do something uncomfortable. A couple thousand years ago today, Someone was doing something very uncomfortable for me. He didn't die for us so that we could live in a nice house, in America, probably a little bigger than we need, have a couple kids and jobs and then retire and move somewhere warm and collect shells.

So talk to your barista about Christ, invite a friend to church, start a Bible study. Start listening to the Holy Spirit and when you feel your face getting red, your heart starting to pound and you think Wow, is that a nudge from the Holy Spirit? Hope not because (speaking to him, inviting her) would make me uncomfortable. As long as it's filtered through the Bible and as Francis Chan said, There's a good chance sharing the gospel with a stranger is Biblically supported.

It's time to be uncomfortable spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially. Maybe you should adopt. You don't want to miss out on this.

We are meeting with Olivia's birthmom next week. I will keep you posted but I am guessing whatever I write will contain the words joyful, awkward, humbling and uncomfortable.